No wise man ever wished to be younger.

I just got back from celebrating my mothers 65th birthday with family and lots of friends. Many of the people at the party knew me before I knew them. They were friends with my parents before I was born and I grew up playing with their children, seeing them at the many parties my parents always hosted and spending holidays with them. Over the years some new friends have joined in and other have sadly passed away and every change has been a part of my life as well as of my parents. Naturally not to the same extent and maybe not always as profound but the weddings, birth of grandchildren, celebrations but also hard times such as divorces, sickness and death have reached me via my parents. As I grew older and travelled the world I saw my parents friends less but I still got the news and heard about their lives.

It was nice to see them all yesterday and get an update about everyone and to hear how busy these pensioners (or pensioners to be) are. The generation from the 40s might be leaving the workforce but they don’t seem to be slowing down. They travel, visiting their kids who all live spread out over the globe, they prepare for later days by moving to apartments, play golf or start new businesses and participate in clubs and cultural events.

However, the best thing about yesterday was not to see them all or to eat the fantastic food my parents had prepared for the 60+ guests. The best thing was to see the love shared for my parents and especially my mum on her big day. My mum has a huge network of friends and she is a member of more clubs and organisations then I can count to. I come from a social family where the doors were always open and dinner parties took place every week and this is still the case. At my parent’s house, life is enjoyed and friends and family are cared for. My mum turned 65 and previously I would have said that this is quite a distinguished age. Still, the spirit yesterday was not one of letting go or giving in. Instead, I believe it was a spirit of enjoying life and doing all of the things that are yet to be done.

In the past I viewed time as a horizontal line stretching into the future. The past was something one could not change and therefore not very interesting.
I have spent many years in different places, meeting different people and sometimes created deep friendship with people who live very far away and that I don’t see very often (or will never see again). At first I thought that friends that I would never meet again were lost friends but now I look at it differently. Friends and family who are no longer in my life due to whatever reason are nevertheless here with me as it is the experiences we share that join us together. The past and the present have merge and I can to some extent decide where the future takes me. My mother filled her house full of friends and family on her 65th birthday and celebrated her aging in a wise way. And I will end this column as I started it using the words of Jonathan Swift;
No wise man ever wished to be younger.

Ulrika Geeraedts